Women today have privileges that we could not experience in the past. We are entering universities and the workforce in record numbers. We are earning great salaries, starting businesses, and obtaining dream careers. We are women and wonderful, but some of us are women in waiting. We are waiting to meet Mr. Wonderful and dreamy. We are waiting for the day to join with a great man, and to be "his woman.”

Do not get me wrong; it is great to have the title "his woman.” It feels good. It is nice to be in love, there's nothing like it. However, you cannot give up who you are to be in love. Chase your dreams, do what you love, keep studying, keep working, and keep investing in yourself.

Scores of women meet Mr. Wonderful and instantly surrender their dreams to support his dreams. In exchange for this surrender she may expect him to make all the right education, career, and financial decisions. There is no allowance for a bad decision because the whole relationship, and possibly, the whole family is riding on the man's dreams and decisions. My advice to every woman is to keep exploring and working toward your dreams when you meet your Mr. Wonderful.

As a woman, you have likes, dislikes, passions, and desires. Why should you surrender those things completely to another? There will be times that you will have to be flexible and creative in order to support your man's dreams and to keep yours going. That is okay. Supporting your man's dreams is encouraged. Being flexible about how you both can achieve your dreams is encouraged. However, surrendering or deferring your dreams indefinitely is strongly discouraged.

I recognize that once you meet your special guy you will probably bear his children. I also recognize that you will probably be the primary caretaker of those children. I further recognize that raising your children can rearrange your life plans. However, it is important not to give up on your dreams and interests for your role as wife and/or mother. Keep something special for yourself. This does not mean we should neglect our children or discard the men we love. It means we should guard our interests, dreams, and aspirations selfishly, and pursue them! Start by taking 15 minutes a day to pursue your dreams. Explain to your family that they must not bother you during this time. Eventually you will build the amount of time you take for yourself, and your family will become well accustomed to not disturbing "your time.”

It is not fair to a man for a woman to place all her hopes and dreams for success on him. It is not fair to a woman for a man to insist that she submit or defer her dreams to his. Think how exciting it could be if you decide from the beginning how you both will live out your dreams and support each other during the process.