Recently a reporter with the Kansas City Star newspaper, Andrea Lorenz, emailed me and asked why golfers seem to have so many successful singles groups and associations. Was it because golfers are different? Was it because golf was co-ed? What was it exactly?

I guess there is not a hard and fast answer to this question but that does not stop us from trying to gain a better understanding of why this is the case.

If we want to understand why golfers have been successful at establishing singles groups or tournaments, we should step back and look at the game of golf itself.

First, golf is a very civilized game.

For many people who truly love the sport, golf is a game about honor, dignity and self-discipline. It is a game about self-improvement and helping others improve. If you want to start a conversation with a golfer just ask them their opinion about something involving the game. A simple question like "where do you position your feet?” can lead to a fifteen-minute conversation.

Second, golf is a very social game.

Many golfers are very comfortable going to their favorite course and playing with a group of people they do not know. It is not uncommon for a threesome of golfing buddies to have a fourth person added at the starters box. If you have played the game long enough, you will undoubtedly have played several rounds with complete strangers. Some of these people remain strangers, while others become life long friends, business partners or confidants.

Many golfers have a great deal of experience playing with people they do not know. For many golfers, they become quite adept at starting conversations with complete strangers. After all, if you spend 4-5 hours playing a round of golf with someone you just met, it would probably be a good idea for you to know how to carry on a conversation.

Finally, golfers all have one thing in common.

Most golfers really love the game or they love to hate the game. Take a group of golfers and put them together in a large room. Regardless if they are Republican or Democrat, conservative or liberal, pro-choice or anti-abortion, all golfers share one common interest - a desire to improve their game.

If you combine a group of people, with one single thing in common, in a civilized and social environment it is not hard to understand how conversations get going and new relationships are formed.

If you want to be successful at online dating, just like golfers try to be successful at their sport, try to be civilized, social and find one thing in common with the person you are communication with. Like golf, every new person you talk with through online dating may not result in a life long friendship. Eventually, if you talk with enough people, you will find that someone special.